Your life gets better during midlife. It is a transition period (midlife crisis). Midlife crisis and its stages help you to make an easier and smoother transition, to accept this natural stage in your life.
After a period of hardship and reflection it enables you to learn how to be and stay happy and healthy. To fullfill your potential. So your life will be awesome. And you know: you can make your dreams come true.
Usually the first phase of your midlifecrisis, the denial of growing older, passes quietly for you and your partner.
In this first phase you are more often curt and you withdraw to a place where nobody can disturb you. The denial phase doesn’t last very long.
The denial phase shifts into anger.
In this second phase of your midlife crisis you grow angry.
Angry with everybody and everything. Also your partner suffers from your anger and doesn’t understand what’s going on.
The main reason why you feel so angry is, because you are feeling wronged by life.
In your eyes, everything up till now has been determined by others. Your upbringing, your education, your work, your relationship, children and so on. It feels like you were trapped in all this.
When you look at the years that have passed you think:
Why on earth do I have such a high mortgage? Why do I have 3 children? And my job: will this be the job I will have for the rest of my life?
My wife, we have been together for 25 yearr. We no longer talk a lot. How are we going to cope the next 25 years? Do I still love her?
Is there any fun in my life? I only have obligations, a job I don’t like. Is this all there will be the rest of my life?
You also have the feeling: what about me? When will it be my turn? After all these years and at this age you just reached the point where you dare to give your opinion.
You want to express your feelings. Actually you want to say what you really think, feel and want in life.
But then you may find that your partner and children really don’t understand what you are talking about.
Before you never complained, you seemed to be happy. What on earth is goiing on? So you keep your mouth shut and you grow more angry. Very angry and upset with everybody and everything.
All kind of ideas and thoughts are racing around in your mind.You want to change your job, emigrate to an differtent country, leave your wife. It doesn’t matter what; you want to flee.
But you also think: is this the solution? You are lost and you grow more angry. You are not open to reason at this moment. You feel so wronged by life.
But hold on. Also this phase will pass and you will go to the third phase:
You want to live life to the full in every aspect!